Next Door

So it’s been a busy time since I last wrote. I’ve been trying so hard to befriend the cats next door. They’re black, tall and handsome. They’re called Mo and Joe. Trouble is they don’t like me. I am trying to get them used to me by just sitting there and not threatening them. Joe has started to come over into my garden and we sit together on the shed roof. Occasionally we hiss at each other.

When I go into their garden I like to watch through the door and see Mo and Joe eating. I’m sure their food is better than mine. I’ve tried hunger strike. It gets more food in my bowl… and then thrown away and then more…. It is just so unappetising. Ma and Pa do spend quite some time with the food drawer open choosing what to feed me. I get all excited thinking it’ll be a gourmet meal but even those pouches that say gourmet are really not a patch on the mice.

Anyway, back to next door. Ma and Pa went away. I now know what this suitcase means when it comes out.

img_6492.jpgApparently it was an idyllic place with views of the sea and of Snowdonia. This did mean, though, that I was left on my own… well not quite on my own but with Auntie C and Uncle E from next door. Auntie C came and fed me and cuddled me. She was really good but I did think that maybe I should simply move into their house. I mean, this has happened before when I was left by my previous owners and it was neighbours who fed me until i was taken to the RSPCA. Or I could simply have two homes. Now I like that idea.

I have managed to get into next door and Auntie C gives me cuddles and sometimes food. Mo and Joe are accepting me more now, even when I’m in their house which is real progress! I am definitely a cat that likes cats (well, most cats).

img_6506-e1496259730517.jpgThe situation changed again the following week when Ma and Pa came home but Auntie C and Uncle E went away. This was weird. I would turn up to greet my other family in the early morning and discover Ma was in there feeding Mo and Joe. This was truly odd.

This is a photo of me feeling very perplexed by the whole thing. Plus, I’m sure they are getting better food than me. I’m not sure how to change that.

As you can see there are no fluffy tails here just an innocent check on my friends and bewilderment regarding Ma. But I do like to see my friends several times a day, especially sitting on that wooden chair which I have claimed as my own.

I have now got myself into more trouble. I had the hiccups today which was most unpleasant and strange. But Ma also hurt me when she picked me up and touched my sore leg. I yelped a bit but realised this was a mistake as I was later bundled off to the vet. I hate the vet; I cry a lot when they give me injections. There is a lump on my leg and apparently this is an abscess from fighting (like I said, I don’t like all cats). I’m ok and feeling much better now. Ma and Pa don’t look too pleased though – this was clear when they made the card payment at the till. I looked the other way and pretended I didn’t know what was happening. I didn’t cry at all on the way home, I thought it best to keep a low profile.  Now this evening I am back on my wooden chair next door. I am determined to have two homes… just for security purposes, you understand. I have abandonment issues.

I am no Murderer

So I love to be outdoors. We all know that. And I love mice. I do also love Ma and Pa but when they sit watching Midsomer Murder and don’t seem to notice me then things must change.

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The catflap is amazing and I love to utilise it (and wear the battery down).  The garden is perfect when Ma comes out with me. When she’s not out I like to investigate the front. There is more to choose from out there: there’s the village green; fields upon fields of farm land; hedgerows; and many dogs… I avoid them. But the mice are not in short supply.

So when Midsomer Murder had been on for quite some time I decided something needed to change. My catflap was essential for this plan. I climbed out and went past my neighbour’s house which gives me access to the front (they have two cats but I’ll tell you about my neighbours another day).

Off I went in search of mice and found a lovely dark brown one. I played with it and purred a lot. I do love to catch the mice especially when they run away and I catch them again. But this was no time for games so I put Mouse in my mouth and headed back to the catflap.

No one noticed when I first came in. There was just 10 minutes left of Midsomer Murder – perfect timing! If I got their attention now they would never know who the murderer was.

I popped the mouse behind the ottoman in the hallway and then I jumped on top and started scratching at the cushion. Unusually, it took a while for Ma to come and find out what I was doing. She looked confused and picked me up but I was determined to get down. That mouse was behind the ottoman! She popped me on the floor and I saw another way though, below the radiator. And that was when Ma screamed to Pa that there had to be a mouse there.

I missed all the fun then because they shut me in the kitchen. I could hear them though. The mouse ran towards the front door and passed all the shoes. Apparently they didn’t actually see it go out. So after they released me I watched them spend quite some time shaking the shoes… How many shoes?

I went back to the ottoman but although I could still smell him there he had clearly gone.

Ma and Pa never did find out who the murderer was in Midsomer. It could have been the purrrrfect murder …

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I am no murderer.